A late Gerard Pique goal wasn't enough to prevent Inter from going through to the final after a dreadful second leg
Good evening everybody and welcome to our minute-by-minute coverage of the second leg of Barcelona v Inter in the Champions League semi-final, with the tie nicely poised at half-time. Internazionale take a two-goal lead into tonight's match, having won the first leg 3-1 at the San Siro in a fascinating match that culminated in a comically petulant display from Mario Balotelli, which you can study in all its glory here.
In the pre-match build-up, Inter manager Jose Mourinho has been busily peddling his unique brand of nonsensical waffle masquerading as profundity, and as usual the press pack have been hungrily lapping it up. The Special One thinks Inter are in the box-seat tonight because they only "dream" of winning the Champions League, while winning it at Real Madrid's home ground, the Bernabeu, at the end of this season has become "an obsession" for Barcelona.
Obviously anyone with even a passing acqaintance with Massimo Moratti will know that Mourinho is talking complete cobblers - if anyone is obsessed with winning the Champions League it's Inter's president. "The final is more than just a dream for us," he said yesterday, temporarily forcing his manager back into his box with a long overdue slapdown.
Team news: Jose Mourinho puts out the same eleven who started the first leg, while Pep Guardiola makes two changes: Yayya Toure and Gabriel Milito come in for the suspended pair Carles Puyol and Maxwell. Toure will operate as midfield anchor, which means that Seydou Keito has to move to left-back. Gabriel Milito starts at centre-back, where he will be hoping to put a stop to the gallop of his older brother Diego, who plays up front for Inter.
Barcelona: Valdes, Dani Alves, Pique, Milito, Keita, Xavi,
Toure Yaya, Busquets, Pedro, Ibrahimovic, Messi.
Subs: Pinto, Marquez, Bojan, Henry, Maxwell, Thiago, Jeffren.
Inter: Julio Cesar, Maicon, Lucio, Samuel, Zanetti,
Cambiasso, Motta, Eto'o, Sneijder, Pandev, Milito.
Subs: Toldo, Cordoba, Muntari, Mariga, Materazzi, Chivu, Balotelli.
Referee: Frank De Bleeckere (Belgium)
Pre-match emails: "Barry, I'll think you'll find Mourinho's a genius," writes Harvey Kelly. "And you're not. He's only marginally more successful and knows only slightly less about football than your good self."
Ooh, this one's good. "I've been looking forward to this match all week but now my wife has been selfish enough to go into labour tonight, thus presenting a problem regards watching the match as the birth of my child rapidly approaches," writes Paul Jaines, who alone among minute-by-minute writers, appears to have had sex in the past nine months and isn't afraid to boast about it. "Thankfully we are having a home birth which means I have access to tv, computer etc - but do you think it would be bad form to have the match on TV while she is in the birthing pool?" Why not just put the birthing pool in front of the TV and then fill it? It'll then be too heavy to move and if the baby doesn't arrive in the next few hours you won't have to vacate it before full-time and let your wife in.
Tactical shenanigans: According to ITV's graphic, Barcelona are going to be playing a 3-4-3 tonight, with Pique, Milito and Toure across the back. That's the kind of news that would excite my colleague Jonathan Wilson, but I have to say it leaves me cold. "Pep Guardiola's made quite a start to his management career, but this other fellow [Mourinho] is a trophy machine," says ITV anchor Matt Smith as he goes to an advert break. Trophies won by Pep Guardiola in one season: 7. Trophies won by the trophy machine in 10 seasons: 10. Hmmm ...
This is interesting: Jose Mourinho has apparently announced that Goran Pandev is "injured" and replaced him with Christian Chivu in the starting line-up. That's a defender for a winger, with the obvious suggestion being that Mourinho has seen the Barcelona line-up and changed his own to suit it without having to waste a substitution. Oh dear sweet God, if this has any obvious bearing on the result the UK press will shove their tongues so far up his jacksy the Special One will have several more waggling spouting nonsense in his own mouth.
Not long now: The teams are out, the 96,000 home fans are rocking the Camp Nou and ITV commentator Clive Tyldesley's banal nonsense is already getting on my nerves, talking about T-shirts Barcelona's players wore last weekend, promising their fans they'd "quite literally play out of their skins tonight". That should make for interesting viewing. Inter wear all white tonight, Barcelona wear their usual home strip.
1 min: They're off and Barcelona win a free-kick in the Inter left-back position within a minute. Xavi lifts it in towards Seydou Keita at the far post, but it's put out for a corner from which nothing comes.
2 min: For Barcelona, Pedro cuts inside Maicon from the left flank and tries a shot from the edge of the area. Wide, but not by much.
4 min: Barca have lined up in a 4-3-3 with Toure and Pique in the centre-back berths and Dani Alves and Gabriel Milito playing at right and left-back respectively. For Inter, Christian Chivu has gone in on the left wing as a direct replacement for the injured Pandev. That'll upset the conpiracy theorists.
7 min: Barca play it long from the back, Ibrahimovic leaps and skims the ball wide off the top of his head. Goal-kick for Inter.
8 min: Lionel Messi tries his first darting run from the centre-circle, only to get knocked off the ball by his international team-mate Esteban Cambiasso.
9 min: Barca are enjoying most of the possession at the moment, unsurprisingly, but aren't doing a great deal with it beyond probing around the area between midfield and the edge of the Inter box, looking for openings.
10 min: Thiago Motta gets booked for a trip on Dani Alves. Free kick for Barca about five yards outside the Inter area, near the right angle.
10 min: Messi crosses the ball to the far post and the referee blows for an infringement in the penalty area. He awards Zlatan Ibrahimovic for a foul on Lucio and remains unmoved when Ibrahimovic shows him that the front of his shirt is ripped from where the defender had grabbed a handful of it.
12 min: Contesting a ball with Messi, Maicon injures his shoulder after sliding into an advertising hoarding. Play is held up as he receives treatment.
14 min: "Thanks for doing this, but can you have your IT people add the auto-refresh button on the page?" asks Dave Hill. "I'm clicking my computer's refresh button way too much. Thanks." I'm very sorry for your trouble, Dave. Sit tight there and I'll just summon my "people" - it's not like I'm busy doing anything else at the moment and I'd hate to see you put out by having to click a mouse every now and again.
16 min: In the Barcelona half of the middle third, Pique is penalised for brushing against Diego Milito, who falls over as if shot by a sniper. Nothing comes from the free-kick.
18 min: Ibrahimovic is penalised for handball on the right-hand side of the Inter penalty area after controlling a pass with his upper-arm. Oh ... and please stop mailing me lengthy missives enquiring about the whereabouts of the auto-refresh button. It's there now and the incessant whingeing of lazy spoilt people is drowning out the big match atmosphere.
20 min: Far be it from me to tell Xavi how to play football, but he just tried to pick out Ibra with a pass from the edge of the penalty area when I think he should have shot, a view that was confirmed when his attempted pass was intercepted by a defender.
23 min: The ball refuses to sit nicely for Xavi as he careers through the Inter penalty area and tries to offload to Ibra. Inter clear.
23 min: Dani Alves sends in a cross which the unmarked Pedro Rodriguez tries to half-volley home from 14 yards. With Inter goalkeeper Julio Cesar anchored to his line, the ball fizzes wide, but not by much.
25 min: Inter finally get forward and the ball is pinged out to the right flank, where Samuel Eto'o is standing alone in acres of space. Between them, Gabriel Milito and Gerard Pique manage to force him out over the endline with the ball at his feet.
26 min: The red card is out! Thiago Motta gets sent off for shoving his flat hand into the face of Sergio Busquets. He got his opponent in the face, but Busquets went down very easily, holding his face ... then had a little peek at the referee to see if he'd be giving Motta his second booking. Have these ladies got no shame? Seriously?
29 min: Motta goes off ... eventually ... trying to start a couple of scraps on his way. He's not one bit happy and cuffs Busquets for getting him sent off. Inter will only have 10 men for the next hour.
30 min: Barca attack down the left wing and Pedro tries to send in a corss. The ball hits Lucio, prompting the fans behind the goal to appeal for a penalty for handball. None is forthcoming, which is just as well because the ball hit his midrift.
33 min: A fantastic save from Julio Cesar, who dives low to his right to tip a rasper from Lionel Messi around the upright. Messi had dashed from right to left across the face of the penalty area before unleashing his shot and bringing a sensational save out of the Inter goalkeeper.
34 min: With Barcelona on a promising attack, Ibrahimovic gives the ball away to Wesley Sneijder and then concedes a free-kick when trying to win it back. At least he tried to win it back, I suppose.
36 min: Julio Cesar gets booked for time-wasting. For all their domination of possession, Barcelona are creating very little. They don't seem to be eviscerating the Inter defence with their usual verve and are losing possession more often than you'd expect as a result of misplaced passes and poor touches. Even with Inter down to 10 men, this might not be their night.
38 min: Alves gets in around the back of Inter's defence and tries to tee up Ibrahimovic , whose shot from eight yards is blocked by Samuel.
39 min: Barca win another free-kick in the Inter left-back position, for an Eto'o foul on Messi. The Argentinian lofts a cross towardss the far post, but there's too much welly on it and it sails out for a goal-kick. Actually make that a free-kick, the ref's spotted another infringement in the area.
41 min: Predictably enough for a 10-man team managed by Jose Mourinho, Inter's players are dropping like flies and pretending they're injured at every opportunity. Chivu is the latest to drop and roll after jumping near Lionel Messi.
43 min: With Sneijder down "injured", Barcelona refuse to put the ball out of play and Messi gallops towards the edge of their penalty area, where he's chopped down by Chivu, who gets booked for his trouble. Ibrahimovic shoots from 35 yards and his effort swerves wildly in the air before fizzing wide of the left post.
44 min: Barcelona continue to pass the ball around the edge of the Inter area, trying to create an opening. Eventually they win a free-kick a good way distance out, near the right touchline. Messi lofts it towards Busquets, but Lucio clears.
44+1 min: Yaya Toure tries to wild shots from distance in quick succession, one of them from a ridiculously narrow angle. ITV's match analyst Jim Beglin makes the astute point that when Barcelona players start doing that it's usually a sign that they're running out of ideas.
Half-time:
Grace Pickering writes: "Re: your comment at 26 Mins regarding 'ladies'. Aside from the tired and lazy sexism, surely it's inaccurate - I thought all you fellas grumbled that we don't go down easily enough?" Fair point, well made Grace.
Oooh ... look. A Gallery of this match that's being added to as the game progresses. You'll have to click on it to open it, mind, and I realise that many of you consider such effort to be far too great of an imposition on your very valuable time.
Half-time analysis: "Seriously, what do you have against Mourinho," asks Halilu Remawa, one of many members of the Jose Mourinho fanclub who appear unable to distinguish between criticism of Mourinho and criticism of reporters who treat his every utterance, however banal, as the word of God.
I have nothing against Mourinho, I just think he's a very good manager who's nowhere near as clever, amusing or intelligent as his cheerleaders in the UK press would have us all believe. Try listening to what he actually says some time, instead of buying into the spin of what assorted journalists put on it and I'd say you won't be long about coming around to my way of thinking.
Second half: Barcelona's players have been ready to start the second half for several minutes, while Inter's are emerging from the tunnel in dribs and drabs. Barca make one change for the second half, with Maxwell, who I incorrectly thought was suspended, replacing ... somebody. I'll find out in a moment.
48 min: Maxwell is on for Gabriel Milito. My expectations for this half are not high - if Barcelona continue playing the way have beenm, they haven't a hope of dragging themselves back into contention for a place in the final. They're sluggish, things aren't going their way and Inter are down to 10 men, which probably suits them better in this situation than having their full complement of players.
49 min: "Do you think you could describe the picture gallery MBM style to save my poor clicking finger?" asks Alex Carey, who is quickly trumped by somebody who's email I accidentally deleted who wants to know if I'll post them as gifs instead of jpegs.
51 min: Xavi plays a long ball from the halfway line towards the edge of the Inter penalty area, which Seydou Keita tries to head down for Ibrahimovic. Inter hack clear.
54 min: Xavi plays the ball into the Inter penalty area, Ibra gets goalside of Lucio and goes down. Julio Cesar rushes off his line to claim the ball and Lucio orders Ibra to his feet, telling him to stop acting the bollix (I'm paraphrasing there).
55 min: Made-up stats. Chances of Inter scoring a goal in the next 35 minutes: 0. Chances of Barcelona scoring any time soon if they don't up their game: 0. This is truly awful.
57 min: The final word on whether or not Jose Mourinho is a genius goes to Gary Naylor, whose results are inconclusive: "I'm certain that (i) Mourinho knows better than anyone how to play Barcelona with ten men; (ii) he will have communicated that to his players precisely. If genius is doing the simplest things in the simplest way, Mourinho is a genius."
60 min: The ball goes out for a corner off Maicon, but the referee awards a goal-kick to Inter. Despite being on a yellow card, Julio Cesar dawdles over it in a bid to waste time. I would laugh like a drain if he got sent off on the back of two bookings for time-wasting.
61 min: Barcelona continue to press and press, but Inter soak it up with consumate ease. Messi goes on a ferrety run through the centre, but is crowded off the ball by Lucio and Chivu, who is wearing his scrum-cap with the flap hanging down so that he bears a passing resemblance to Biggles.
63 min: Barcelona double substitution: Ibrahimovic and Busquets off, Bojan and Jeffren on. Now the referee is over giving Jose Mourinho a ticking-off for the heinous crime of leaving his technical area to give instruction to Chivu.
65 min: Barcelona win a corner, which Xavi sends in to the mixer. Lucio heads clear. Internazionale substitution: Sneijder off, Sully Muntari on.
67 min: This is painful viewing, so be grateful you're not watching unless you're one of the disturbing number of weirdos who reads minute-by-minute reports on the internet while simulataneously watching on TV, apparently with the sole intention of sending in angry emails detailing any little mistake you happen to spot.
69 min: Dani Alves floats in a cross from the right channel, aiming for Seydou Keita. Lucio leaps, heads clear, lands on the ground and takes another 30 seconds out of the clock by feigning injury.
71 min: Sensational! This is absolutely sensational! Inter have won a corner.
72 min: Meh! Milito arrows it into the penalty area, where Lucio is penalised for some manner of infringement or other.
73 min: Just over 15 minutes to go and Barcelona need to score two goals. The way they're going at the moment, they could continue playing until midnight and not score. Their Plan A isn't working and they don't appear to have a Plan B.
75 min: Lucio, Maicon, Cambiasso and Zanetti take turns in heading the ball out of the Inter penalty area. Barcelona are pressing them continuously, but Inter are repelling their attacks with ease. It's almost as if Barca are resigned to losing and are just sending in cross after cross for want of something better to do.
77 min: A Barcelona player stands within a yard of Maicon, who immediately goes to ground holding his shin. The referee signals to him to get up.
78 min: Jeffran gets in behind the Inter defence and squares the ball across the edge of the six-yard box, where there should be a queue of Barca players waiting to poke it home, but isn't. Bojan eventually shoots wide from a narrow angle. They should have pulled a goal back there.
80 min: Pep Guardiola sends Gerard Pique up to play centre-forward. On ITV, Jim Beglin says he could have left Ibrahimovic up there if he needed somebody tall up front. Surely, I can't be the only one who'd rather have a centre-half playing up front on my team in the centre-forward position than Zlatan Ibrahimovic? This is a big game after all, and not the sort of occasion in which Zlatan thrives.
83 min: Oh, that's a woeful miss. Unmarked and on the end of a Messi cross, Bojan heads wide from six yards with half the goal gaping. That's terrible.
GOAL! BARCELONA 1-0 INTER (AGG: 2-3) (PIQUE 84) Makeshift centre-forward Gerard Pique shows Zlatan how it's done by picking up a defence-splitting through ball from Xavi, drawing Julio Cesar towards him, turning on a sixpence and slotting the ball home from 12 yards.
86 min: Having halved their deficit, Barcelona are attacking with renewed vigour. That finish from Pique was marvellous and has really buoyed his team and its fans. They need another goal to make it through to the final and have four minutes and whatever extra time the ref adds on to get it.
87 min: Xavi and Messi take shots on goal in quick succession. Xavi's effort is parriedb y Cesar, while Messi fires the ball straight at him.
88 min: Barcelona stroke the ball around the edge of the Inter penalty, before Dani Alves goes down under a challenge from Sully Muntari while trying to run on to a through-ball from Messi. Alves appeals for a penalty, but doesn't get one. He was being held, by Muntari, who let go of him as he entered the penalty area. Alves took a dive anyway.
90 + 1 min: Barcelona score the important goal courtesy of Bojan, but it's disallowed because of a Yaya Toure handball in the build-up. That's a harsh decision - it was very much ball-to-hand; there was nothing he could do about it.
92 min: Two minutes to go and Barcelona are still trying to pass and play their way out of trouble.
90+3 min: Alves sends in two crosses from the right in quick succession, both of which are cleared by Maicon. Barcelona win a corner.
90+4 min: It's all over. Xavi plays it short to Messi, who squares the ball for Alves, outside the penalty area. He pings it into the box, it's hacked clear and the referee blows for full-time. Barcelona are out and Internazionale have qualified for the final.
Post-match niceties: With Barcelona players strewn around the battlefield like corpses on the set of Braveheart and Inter's celebrating wildly, Jose Mourinho sprints on to the pitch, his arms raised giving it the full Messiah to the Inter fans up in the gods. Victor Valdes tries to drag him away before he antagonises too many Barcelona fans, but Mourinho ignores him.
Post-match analysis: "That was a triumph for Mourinho's style of management," writes Henry Shawdon. "I cant wait to get that quality of shirt-pulling, injury-feigning, timewasting and transcendental negativity back in the Premiership."

